CHRISTMAS EVE

"Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful."

It's never really been any day special to me. Christmas was one of those days where my brother, my sister, and I would hope that the people who gave out donated toys wouldn't forget about us. My "mom" would sit on the couch & act as if she didn't care about how we felt or what went on in our heads. Why would you let your kids feel as if they were alone & that there was no one out there to save them? I'm not gonna let any of my kids feel that way again because I know how horrible it is to feel that way. I still wonder how did I grow up, not hating her? I always came back to elementary, middle, and high school with nothing new or no exciting family stories like the other kids. I'd be embarrassed most years and spend Christmas with one of my "friends", but that never worked out as good because no one understood what I was going through. I mean it isn't normal, but I thought that people would at least care to listen. I do remember maybe 2 or 3 Christmas's where my school & a charity gave us tons of toys and the looks my brother & sister had on their faces. I can say that each Christmas in the past was a learning lesson today. But, Christmas is about giving & that's one thing I've never stopped loving! So here's some advice, 

"Appreciate & Love Everything." -Cole

(Please feel free to comment your view/opinion)

Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist

“I always think of each night as a song. Or each moment as a song. But now I'm seeing we don't live in a single song. We move from song to song, from lyric to lyric, from chord to chord. There is no ending here. It's an infinite playlist.” 

I love reading because of the unique experience  you get. That moment when you finish a book, look around, and realize that everyone around you is carrying on with their lives as though you didn't just experience emotional trauma at the hands of a paperback. It's like you're entering someone else's world, while going through a learning experience also. The reason I believe that I'm obsessed with love stories is because it gives a feeling that nothing else does. Love is something that most don't experience as much or have less knowledge about. I connect with love stories because that's a moment I've longed for since I can remember. "The feeling of being in love"  - Cole

 (If you have any inputs, please let me know what you think)

Bad Day

¨There's nothing wrong or evil about having a bad day. There's everything wrong with making others have it with you.¨

There are some days I feel as if no one cares & that if I died today no one would even notice. Then those other days I know that it may be true. But, no matter what may be true or a lie, I continue to do what I believe is best for me & those whom I care about. & just because someone makes me feel a certain way or does something horrible to me doesn't mean that I quit caring or lose love for them. My heart is weird & doesn't seem to let go of the people who should be here for me. I read & write just about everyday because it's what keeps my head straight & makes me feel better. I don't like it when people judge me or make assumptions because of how I view something. Like seriously, I'm only human, just like everyone else. Therefore, I do as I please and I don't listen to someone because that doesn't take the time to listen to me. Sorry Guys, but today is one of those days where I'm feeling emotional towards certain things lol & I was listening to Bad Day by Justin Bieber I love you all for reading this post :D <3...

Love & Lust

¨If they substituted the word 'Lust' for 'Love' in the popular songs it would come nearer the truth.¨

 LOVE is something you know for sure! I have been in love once, a special girl from middle school (we're still good friends). There's no second guessing and it's pretty hard to let go of that feeling. People should learn the value of this word before saying it. True Love never dies (maybe fades away), it bonds for a lifetime, it's attached, pure, sweet, kind, committed, caring, attractive and bonding. 

LUST is all about sexual attraction and will kill any relationship. I've lusted a girl before, I thought that we were in love, but the only thing I really loved about her was the way she kissed me & how she was in bed (good thing I'm not like that anymore). Now look to build a friendship first & everything else comes next..I got the idea from liddorican on instagram. 

¨I believe that most people get the two confused and that's how promises & hearts are broken.¨  -Cole