CHRISTMAS EVE

"Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful."

It's never really been any day special to me. Christmas was one of those days where my brother, my sister, and I would hope that the people who gave out donated toys wouldn't forget about us. My "mom" would sit on the couch & act as if she didn't care about how we felt or what went on in our heads. Why would you let your kids feel as if they were alone & that there was no one out there to save them? I'm not gonna let any of my kids feel that way again because I know how horrible it is to feel that way. I still wonder how did I grow up, not hating her? I always came back to elementary, middle, and high school with nothing new or no exciting family stories like the other kids. I'd be embarrassed most years and spend Christmas with one of my "friends", but that never worked out as good because no one understood what I was going through. I mean it isn't normal, but I thought that people would at least care to listen. I do remember maybe 2 or 3 Christmas's where my school & a charity gave us tons of toys and the looks my brother & sister had on their faces. I can say that each Christmas in the past was a learning lesson today. But, Christmas is about giving & that's one thing I've never stopped loving! So here's some advice, 

"Appreciate & Love Everything." -Cole

(Please feel free to comment your view/opinion)

LONELY

"The time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself."

It's not being alone that I hate. It's the fact that sometimes you really have to be alone in order to move forward in the world. I don't have any friends, but I do have EXACTLY 2 people who I contact once or twice a week (if they answer). They aren't even friends, they're people who I met, had an interest in, & they kinda stuck around. The reason I don't have any friends or a girlfriend is because I don't want anyone around while I'm going through this & most people just never have the time to listen to 2 words I have to say. The reason for getting into a relationship is because you believe that the person will treat you just as well as you treat them. (I guess it's just me) I don't talk much, but the few words I do have to say should mean something. It's kinda like I feel as if I'm an OUTCAST to the world & no one will ever understand why I operate or act a certain way. I like daydreaming alone, while I'm sitting along the river. Or roaming the streets in my small city. Or even listening to music that gets me to reminisce on certain things. The point that I'm trying to get to here is "Sometimes, it's good to like being alone...At least you know that there's someone out there you can trust." -Cole

(Please feel free to comment your view/opinion below)

HATERS

''Haters never win. I just think that's true about life, because negative energy always costs in the end.''

The ones that smile in your face, but despise you secretly. Or the ones that tell you to give up because it's to hard. Or the ones who tell you that you'll never amount to anything. Or the people who pretend to care for you, but disappear when you really need em! I think that everyone gets the idea lol I don't really pay attention to the people who aren't included in my day to day life. I mean yeah, I love my family, but most of them can be secretly haters. I try to keep my circle small, trust nobody, & don't expect much from others. (because no one owes you) I keep to myself & I don't let the actions of others interfere with what I do. I GIVE because I love making other lives better in every way I can & I'm not gonna stop for anyone (even if someone betrays me), I SMILE because it lets me know that everything's alright & it reminds me why I do this, I LOVE because it's one of the only things in life that are real & I believe that depending on how you use, determines where you go once we pass away, & I DON'T HATE because it ruins you & there's nothing to gain by hating someone else. ''You can let the haters HATE, but don't let them control'' -Cole

(Please feel free to express your view/opinion on the topic below)

DREAMS

''A dream doesn't become reality through magic; it takes sweat, determination and hard work.''

It's the only way to receive what I believe to be true happiness. When I was in school most of my teachers were unhappy, but made it seem like it was okay for you to give up on your dream or settle for something less. They always say ''make sure you have a backup plan'' & I always asked ''What if this is what makes me happy?'' there was never an answer; always another excuse for giving up. I don't believe in going into something just for the money or material possession. In order to be extremely successful is to focus intensely on ONE specific goal or task & work insanely to complete it! Don't give up on what you love, because nothing else is going to give you that same feeling. I like to day-dream, meet new people, write blog post, come up with ideas, the benefits of working hard, and make my loved ones smile. I feel that through writing I can do all of each & will continue to do so. The art of storytelling excites me. I love helping out others & I know that if one day I were to make it BIG in the profession that I'll show how much I love & care for others & the less fortunate. 

(Please feel free to express your opinion or view on the topic below)

Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist

“I always think of each night as a song. Or each moment as a song. But now I'm seeing we don't live in a single song. We move from song to song, from lyric to lyric, from chord to chord. There is no ending here. It's an infinite playlist.” 

I love reading because of the unique experience  you get. That moment when you finish a book, look around, and realize that everyone around you is carrying on with their lives as though you didn't just experience emotional trauma at the hands of a paperback. It's like you're entering someone else's world, while going through a learning experience also. The reason I believe that I'm obsessed with love stories is because it gives a feeling that nothing else does. Love is something that most don't experience as much or have less knowledge about. I connect with love stories because that's a moment I've longed for since I can remember. "The feeling of being in love"  - Cole

 (If you have any inputs, please let me know what you think)

Bad Day

¨There's nothing wrong or evil about having a bad day. There's everything wrong with making others have it with you.¨

There are some days I feel as if no one cares & that if I died today no one would even notice. Then those other days I know that it may be true. But, no matter what may be true or a lie, I continue to do what I believe is best for me & those whom I care about. & just because someone makes me feel a certain way or does something horrible to me doesn't mean that I quit caring or lose love for them. My heart is weird & doesn't seem to let go of the people who should be here for me. I read & write just about everyday because it's what keeps my head straight & makes me feel better. I don't like it when people judge me or make assumptions because of how I view something. Like seriously, I'm only human, just like everyone else. Therefore, I do as I please and I don't listen to someone because that doesn't take the time to listen to me. Sorry Guys, but today is one of those days where I'm feeling emotional towards certain things lol & I was listening to Bad Day by Justin Bieber I love you all for reading this post :D <3...

Reflective Tuesday

¨I see myself as an intelligent, sensitive human, with the soul of a clown which forces me to blow it at the most important moments.¨

The past few months I've been experiencing what I believe to be the most important moments of my life. I'm not saying that the days are fun & exciting. But, I'm figuring out where it is I want to be & who is it that I want to be in this world. Who am I? What are my values? What is it that I stand for? Making the decision to choose 1 area & focus intensely towards accomplishing that ONE specific goal. No matter what goes on, who likes it, or what others think. I'm tired of spending my days listening to people that I don't want to be like. Or even working for someone & having them decide how much they'll pay & when I'll work. I want to feel free, make my own choices, & do what I love. I know that if I continue with what I love, one day I'll be able to find a way to live the lifestyle in which I'm fascinated by. Maybe I'm wrong with my perspective, If you believe so. please comment & let me know...